First Rumor is NOT good

Before I talk about the rumors, I must first address the terrible formula poisoning. I have read blurbs about the tainted formula. I cannot wrap my head around it. To spend too much time dwelling on it will make me crazy, simply because I cannot do a thing to change/help it. I know it has affected thousands of children in China. I am sure that our daughters and sons have ingested the toxins. I am sickened and outraged about these events. I am so angry I could scream, but that is not constructive. My heart goes out to all the children, to the ayi's, to the parents, and to the adoptive parents. Stay strong.
Now for the first, bad rumor. It appears that China will put out a small batch of referrals, one day. They want to get "a handle" on the tainted formula crisis, as well they should. I wish everyone good health......

OMG!

The RQ website is down.....how will I make it through the day?????
UPDATE: I found the "old" RQ website. It is a blog. Click here if you are in search of rumors about the referral cut-off!

On Baby Watch

Many, many years ago when I was pregnant with the old one and the young one, I remember what the last two weeks was like. Everyone was on baby watch. Everyone was extra attentive. If I called someone, an immediate return phone call was made "to check to make sure I wasn't in labor."

Now the there is a definite difference between pregnancy and international adoption, aside from the obvious physical. When I was preggers, everyone knew my due date. With this international adoption thing, I feel like I have been making guesses about my due date and people just don't "get it."

I have three friends, who have been down this road before (you both know who you are-L,-R,-T). These women are on my baby watch. I feel a bit like EF Hutton, I call and they listen. Each one of them will call me back right away hoping that I have the "news" for them. You guys are cracking me up. I like calling them, just to see how quickly they respond, a bit The Boy Who Cried Wolf-ish. Seriously Ladies, thanks for being my baby watch, thanks for being there, and thanks for your unrelenting support during this arduous wait. It has meant so much to me! BTW, I'll call you later today..........

The latest redeux

Our lovely Spanish RQ has made contact with her mole, and she expects to hear something by the end of this week regarding the cut-off.
I keep telling myself that I am surprising not as excited as I thought I would be, however, my body language says something very different. I have for several years had bouts with insomnia. Twice over the last few days I have awoken in the wee early morning hours (and I get up at 4:20, so you know it is early) to have difficulty returning to sleep. I have injured fingers from hitting the refresh button every minute! I have been on the computer more than usual. All of these things lead up to perhaps I am more excited than I once believed.....

The Latest

Well, we are, as we have been for the last 3 years, in a holding pattern. I have to say, however, that this holding pattern feels very different from the holding pattern that previous 30 something months had brought. I will not be disappointed with referrals next month, even if I am NOT included. Wow! I can say that with such confidence and truth. If it will not happen in October, then November it is!!! (I don't know why I added December in the poll.)
I have read other blogs over the last few years. At one time, when I was full of excitement about being in logged in, I had nearly 20 blogs that I followed. Joe asked me this morning how I could read and follow other people's lives. I suppose it is because we have a bond and a mutual understanding with others waiting, and we revel in their referrals and excitement. Is it living vicariously through others? I suppose. In any event, thank you to all who have shared your thoughts, your lives, your depression, your elation, and more with me.
One more thing, in order to cope with the long and trying wait, I stopped counting months since LID and forgot about anniversaries (on the 17th of the month). So thanks to the people who did keep track: I think we are at 31 now and nearing the end!! Wha Hoo!!!

Poll Results

First, I must fess up that I logged on a new computer to check my very scientific poll, and I had to vote to view the results. I voted October (because I am hopeful). So the results, minus my October vote, at the time of this post are:
October-7 votes
November-8 votes
December-2 votes
So as you extrapolate from the raw data (trying to sound RQ here), it seems likely that November is the month, however, October is a distinct possibility. And who the hell put December???? Just kidding thanks for taking the time to vote.
So what I conclude is that I am not sure for either month......what??? As R says over and over, "the closer you get, you still don't know!!!"
I would expect to see referrals arrive September 30 or October 1. That is my prediction for "when."

Poll Time

What do ya'll think? When will that precious referral with that gorgeous face arrive? Remember that my LID is 2/17/06 and the CCAA has completed referrals through 2/9/06.

My Sunday......

Sunday I spent the day organizing and purging. I went into Flora's room, and although it appeared ready to the untrained eye, there were 6 rubbermaid boxes and a closet full of children's clothes that had to be "taken care of." I went through nearly all of the remaining clothes of the girls. I cleared 7, yes SEVEN trash bags full of kids clothes. Mostly sizes 5, 6, 6X, and 7. I gave them all to my friend. Who then passes them onto her friends, and so on. Flora's drawers are full and two boxes remain in the closet. One with two diaper bags, just to keep them dust free. And the other box is filled with the items we are taking to China. It feels so good to have "nested" a bit.
E and C also finished a project for Flora. Several years ago they purchased stuff to make a blanket for her. Well they started and completed it this weekend. It seems as the excitement is creeping back into our lives. The girls are getting more excited as J and I are too. See, R., I am not so pessimistic and glum. I think the emotionality of this wait has bothered me more than anything else ever, in terms of emotion. I guess it will be all that sweeter when she is finally here!

One is all you get!

So I log on to RQ this afternoon. Wow we are so close....I was amazed. There I am little ole me right under the horrid case. Well then she writes, if this next batch is decent sized, then I will conduct another poll. What? What? I only got to participate in ONE poll? Are you kidding me? Wow! Okay, I guess I'll take my referral and move on.

Holy Crap!

I can't believe that I woke up this morning to a rumor that said the 9th of February is the cut-off!!! I am shocked! Amazed! Unbelievable! I had the two sided thing going on. On one hand, I wanted to believe that the CCAA would make it to the 16th of February! That would give us one month to get organized....and we would know that we were definitely in for October. On the other hand, I was wondering if we would even get referrals for September. I thought the CCAA would throw us the bone of February 1st-5th (ala dates forward with no referrals). I can't believe that this might be true. The only thing that "worries" me is several agencies on Friday reported that matching had not even begun yet.....Here are my guesses for a referral month: there is an outside chance for October, a very strong chance for November, and an even more of an outside chance for December. I laugh because I have been guessing all along, and so far, I have been wrong every time. Now that we are closer, I have to be right at some point!! So all this waiting and we are almost there......again Holy Crap!

And we are into February....

Just when you are thinking of fall, leaves, football, pumpkins, and Halloween I am talking about FEBRUARY? That's right. The next batch of referrals should reflect the beginning of referrals from February (06). The first five days of February there were no dossiers logged in. So the first day we should see is February 6th. I am hoping that they will get all the way to February 16th. Then next month, October, I know with a February 17th LID I am in and I am prepared for it!!!

I am back

OMG. I am so emotional about this wait. I can not handle so much of the up and downs this crazy journey brings. I realized that I do not have the iron stomach that I thought I had.
It sucks! It sucks! It sucks!
Still waiting, not happily, not joyfully, not patiently, just waiting.........

I let it slip away...

Our 20 something anniversary came and went. I forgot about it for the most part (as I have many of our past anniversaries), until many of my travel mates were posting. I read somebody's blog several months ago (maybe a year ago) who stopped counting and it did her a lot of good. I tried it too. It was hard the first month on the seventeenth I remembered everything. Same with the second month. Then I got to the point where I remembered the date, (the 17th) but not the calculation of time, i.e. 20 months). Now the seventeenth slips away as a regular day. But now as I find us closer to our referral date, I am noticing once again. Still not too excited, but getting there.
My friend R. says the closer you are to your referral, you still don't know your date. Are we 2 months out? Are we 4 months out? Are we 6 months out? (if we are six months out, shoot me N-O-W!)
On the positive side, it appears that the Olympics are not going to be interfering with the referral process per my agency and what seems to be happening with travel approval. I know of someone who will be China bound on 15 AUG. Good news. Although, my belief has always been that referrals will be effected in the September batch of referrals, not so much August. We will have to wait and see.
And finally to Nina, Alyson & Ford, and Dave(people I follow).......fingers crossed! You will be next! I a pulling for you!!!

My house, the pig sty!

I swear my house is as dirty as it can possibly be. We are infested with bugs! We are so disgusting that we have attracted bugs to our bodies. Yes all of the people in my house with a double X chromosome have LICE!!!! LICE!!! In case you did not read correctly I wrote.....L-I-C-E!!!! EEEWWWwwwwwwwww..............GGGrrroooossssssss.

Yep that is how I feel about it. Basically, on E's 13th birthday, she had a sleep over. I happen to be hugging 9:00 pm after singing Happy Birthday to the older one. I looked at C's hair and she was infested with lice. I saw hundreds of eggs. I had not noticed her scratching at all. So after a quick once over to check all of the party guests (only one had it) and the birthday girl (she had it) and me (I had it), my lovely and thankfully bald husband went the drug store to purchase nix to apply to the "dirty girls!" We stayed up until 11:30 that night combing hair. And we called all of the parents offering to return their "dirty" party girls to them. All declined. So the next morning, I combed again. I have since learned that a careful combing which should take a minimum of 2 hours per child should be done. On a side note, I already had lice once this year in May at school. Luckily, the children did not get it then.
Needles to say, E. will always remember her 13th birthday as the birthday she got lice, and I spent the evening combing our her best friends hair!
I have since spent a minimum of 5-6 hours a day combing. I did not realize that nit picking is a full time job!
I have acquired my PhD in LICE! I will type it again...eeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww........ggrrooosssssssssssssss!

Happy Birthday, old one!

My older daughter, E, is officially a teenager. Today she is the big 13!!! Everyone says hold on teenage years. So far things have been great with her, me and us! I know that things may change, but I try to remember what it was like to be that age when I talk to her! So far it has helped. She talks to me about many things, of course not everything. However, I would never expect her to talk to me about everything! That would undermine the experience of being an adolescent! She has a great head for making excellent choices and decisions. I am proud of her everyday! One question however......with adolescents does forgetfulness appear? She seems to forget so much. She has lost countless things this past year. She will inadverntently forget to do something I just asked her to do (and she is not being difficult). Nonetheless, I welcome the babysitting years!!!!!!! Bring 'em on!!!
HAPY BIRTHDAY, E!

New Look!

I am the proud winner of a blog make over aka blake over! Miss Tiff ( aka June's mama) redid my blog. She a Miss R believe that my referral is coming soon!! I am glad someone has some optimism. I know I have been cynical for so long it is hard to turn off. Really I believe my month will be October! I love my new blake over...what do you think?

The British Virgin Islands 2008

Okay let me say that this vacation (we did the same thing last year) is the best vacation!! We charter a sailboat. We sail the sailboat from one beautiful island to the next. It is an amazing vacation......did I say that already? Our two daughters, the two of us. No TV. No outside stuff. No plans. No commitments. No rushing. Just lounging. Just snorkeling. Just reading. Just sailing.

Last year when we went I had delusions of grandeur that our little Flora would travel with us this year. In January when we started planning this trip, we were hesitant. What if referrals come and what if we are supposed to be traveling? We threw caution to the wind and decided to go for it. One of the few examples of not putting our lives on hold for China. I am glad we did it!

Tagged?!

OK what does that mean? For what? After a few minutes of research I discovered what it means .....Go visit Nina and Ford and Alyson to see.....
My six word memoir is

Family, Love, Laughter, and Health, Serendipity!

Now, you folks are officially tagged:
Rebecca
Tiffany
Leslie
Kim
Shannon

As to the person who tagged me.....thank you. I liked this one!

Busy and on vacation

Yes, I am still around! Yes, we are still adopting! Yes, I have been on the greatest vacation, again! Yes, I have completed my fingerprints for the third, and FINAL time-no matter what! No, I have not updated my home study (getting ready to start that process). Spoke with my agency today. They predict (she was kind enough to pull out her crystal ball) and I predict an October referral date (unless that O thing gets in the way). Can you say Peking Duck instead of Turkey for Thanksgiving???

two months? really??

I would like to thank R who reminded me about this blog here. I haven't posted in two months. Wow so much has happened personally, and a snail's pace has happened at the CCAA. I am so disillusioned by the showing at the CCAA lately. I can not bring myself to post. Thanks R for the reminder.