Still Waiting

Not dead! Still in limbo! Still waiting. We have decided to hedge our bets and schedule a vacation. We are going to visit the BVI again this year. Our family is so excited..... 10 days, sailing, snorkeling, living......Our lives have been in limbo for years. When will that referral arrive? It certainly hasn't arrived yet an we have held off doing somethings. Well no more. This carefree, piss into the wind attitude will secure a June referral for sure.......just wait and see. As I shared with m RQ February forum friends I am taking one for the team in order to secure a June referral for us all. Actually, I see more of an August referral with an October/November travel time. But we shall see.
I have noticed that although there is still a huge gap between potential referral dates June-December, I see a smaller window forming with a likely referral date. I still believe that even a month or two from our actual referral, the numbers will reveal a three month window of likely dates. I would not be disappointed with a cut off date of February 15 or 16. Even though our LID is February 17, that would mean that we were definitely next. That is a good position to be in these days with the CCAA.
It.will.happen.this.year.

Two Years

That's right! It has been two years since we were logged in at the CCAA in China. We would have never thought for a second that we would be waiting 2.5 years at a minimum. When I think about how quickly this wait is growing, it is mind boggling. L waited 18 months (logged in Oct 05). She received her referral in April. R waited 21 months (logged in Nov 05). She received her referral in August. My wait is already three months longer than R's and I fully expect another 8 month wait. It is sad, disheartening, and painful to watch people wait for their children.
So, happy 2 year anniversary to us!

Referrals are here

Please go check out Zoe! She is gorgeous. I hope they make there for Zoe's first birthday!

Referrals? Maybe, maybe not?!?

There are rumors out there that referrals are on their way, and the cut off is December 27, 2005. Now that is great news as Zoe's mom will be getting her referral (see the blogs listed). It is also great news because in my heart I did not believe that referrals would get past the 20th (i.e one day's worth of referrals). So I am pleasantly surprised! What does that mean for us? Good question! As soon as I have that answer, I will let you know. R told me, when she was awaiting her Nov 17, 2005 referral, the closer you get, you still don't know. She was right. Although we are less than two months away, we have no idea when our number will be up! It could be any where from April (totally unlikely) to December (on the outer range of timing). Have I mentioned the Olympics? What kind of twist is that going to throw into this mix??? We will have to wait and see.

On another note, any and all adoption folk know of the weather devastation happening in China right now. Half the Sky is an organization collecting money to help the orphanages. I am sick because our daughters and sons, collectively, are without heat, food and water. Please donate to Half the Sky to help the children of the world. It is so devastating I can barely wrap my mind around the events there right now. Cold and hungry babies/children are simply horrific.

So much to say, so much to say...

Let's see so much has been happening lately. I feel like I am back on the boards visiting my few favorite blogs. We applied for yet another SN child, because the first three weren't enough. A boy. Darling C. got braces. I, too, got braces. I have some lovely eye disorder that will never be written on a HS. It really isn't a big deal, nothing that therapy and glasses won't cure. Slow my roll...did I mention boy??? Well, yes we requested a girl, officially. Yet our agency posted this list of SN kiddos, and there was the most beautiful boy I have ever seen. Catch is we are family #2. The number ones have his file now and if they say no way, Jose, we are next in line. Boy? BOY? B-O-Y? OMG, I have more fri@@in' pink stuff, either left over or new than I know what to do with. Can you say ebay and shopping spree? Well, honestly chances are slim at best. Family #1 applied for him. They are now reviewing. He will go to the family that is meant to be. Them? Us? Some dark horse? So we wait some more. I am at peace with this whole deal SN, the wait, the whole process. Life is good. I am glad to be here, and our child will be here someday. You caught me at a post chocolate, post Merlot moment. Peace!

Happy Anniversary times TWO....
The 17th of January was our 23 month anniversary for our LID. Then, the 18th of January was our 16th wedding anniversary. The first anniversary slipped by on my radar, as I try not to focus too much energy on the time waiting. The wedding anniversary was a divine meal out with my dear hubby. Of course, our quiet meal brought good conversation. Thoughts of when our daughter will join us certainly did fill a few moments of conversation, however, we once again affirmed our commitment to our daughter and to this process.
I am at peace with everything. Peace is a good place to be. I do check RQ hourly waiting to see any movement of any news/rumors. I am excited, for one of my fellow bloggers is next! yipee! But the next referral batch also gives me a glimpse of when the window might be for our referral. As we get closer that window will start to close. I would anticipate an April (total long shot) to a December (probably on the outer realm) window for a referral.
My heart goes out to all of you waiting. The not knowing seems to be the hardest. I feel for those beyond a February 28, 2006 referral. That wait will grow exponentially. What I keep holding onto is that these are smaller months (December is almost over, January and February are smaller). The CCAA should finish February 2006 in 2009.
So happy anniversary to me. Sixteen years...holy crap, I am old!
Peace to all.....

Friday and a Make-Over

Thought I would lend a new look to the blog. Blogger makes it so easy, even if you aren't too techie.....
The photograph is from our trip last year to the British Virgin Islands. We are hoping to go again, especially with this ever increasing wait. Those are the children of our friends and their Cat boat in the distance. It was the most amazing vacation ever and I hope to repeat it!

So I am back on track.....

Alright after a bit of a break, I think I am back on track. A few postings on the RQ forum, I am feeling better and more thoughtful about the adoption process. Yes, I am anxious to have our daughter join us, but truly she is a gift from China. And quite honestly, China will decide when we she will join our family officially. Yes, I am still impatient. But we are lucky to have her, and I will wait for her until she comes!
Having said all that, I have returned to reading some of my select few fellow bloggies. I got this from Nina. Thanks Nina! you are right. It is on the money!

Your Inner Color is Purple

Your Personality: You're a dreamer and visionary. You believe you were put on this earth to do something great. You in Love: You're very passionate but often too busy for love. You need a partner who sees your vision and adopts it as their own. Your Career: You need a job that helps you make a difference. You have a bright future as a guru, politician, teacher, or musician.

What's Your Inner Color?

Am I off....or what?

With the Spanish RQ predicting a cut off date of Dec 19, 2005, I am way off with my predictions. Guess that is why I didn't continue with the Stats courses in College. I really never believed that December was going to take more than 3-4 months to get through. It looks like close to 5 months to get through the smaller month of December. I am so tired, but still hanging in there.
Hope your Christmas was bright. I had a nice one with my girls and hubby!
May 2008 bring you peace, love, happiness, and health. It will bring us another year of waiting. I am thinking that the Olympics will not even effect our adoption, because we will not be there until next year! Here's to 2009!

The Ostrich

Head in the sand.....no way.....not coming out..........the wait is wearing me down......la,la,la,la,la,la.......I can't hear you! When wlll that referral come......April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November???? Wake me when it is over!

Wow! the guilt...

Do I feel guilty for not writing...not so much. I am just treading water these days. In a holding pattern waiting for the call. I am, however, wrestling with the guilt or better yet sadness of turning down a SN referral. We, as a result of the ever lengthening wait, have put an application in with our agency for a SN child. I carefully listed all of our strengths as a family and individually. We got a call based on our "strengths". When I put in the application for a SN child, I had something in my mind. A single SN in my mind. When we got the call, this darling little girl had two SN. So, after much family discussion, we decided that she needed more than we could give as a family. So the sadness comes from having that photo in my hand, having the ability to change her life, having the ability of getting my daughter now, having the ability to parent this beautiful little soul.

My crystal ball...

I have consulted and re consulted my crystal ball. It hasn't answered me until today. Today I went back to that referral calculator website. I plugged in all of my guesses/predictions for our referral. I came up with a date and date that appeared TWICE with two different sets of data. My referral date is drum roll please.....April 30th. On that day I will see my daughter's face for the first time! I needed to consulted the crystal ball, I did, and I now have a date!
APRIL 30, 2008!!

19 Months

Oh how did I miss our 19 month LID anniversary?
I know because:

1. Time is ticking by without a referral, so I lost track of time and LID!
2. My friend, Rebecca is in China now getting her absolutely gorgeous baby, MeiLin. I have been following her blog hourly. Go see it!
3. Her friend Tiffany is there as well. Things did not go as well for her until yesterday (pics on R's blog).
4. Working
5. Having my house painted (inside). Yay!

I am still thinking that this adoption thing WILL happen in Mar, Apr, May, June timeframe!

Remember This Entry?

ODDS: Likely, Hopefully, Dreaming
Sept: 24 Nov, 29 Nov, Finish Nov
Oct: 4 Dec, 9 Dec, 10 Dec
Nov: 8 Dec, 21 Dec, 20 Dec
Dec: 15 Dec, 5 Jan, 31 Dec
Jan: 26 Dec, 13 Jan, 15 Jan
Feb: 6 Jan, 24 Jan?, 31 Jan
Mar: 13 Jan, 4 Feb?, 15 Feb
Apr: 21 Jan?, 15 Feb?, 29 Feb
May: 29 Jan?, 26 Feb?, 7 Mar
Jun: 6 Feb?, 8 Mar?, 14 Mar
Jul: 16 Feb?, 19 Mar?, 21 Mar
Aug: 24 Mar?, 30 Mar?, 28 Mar


Congrats to all the families who will be seeing their children's faces for the first time. Referrals are in and they are through the 25th of November.

Believe it or not, I am pleased that the CCAA got through the 25th. Surprised and pleased. We are getting closer!

18 months

WOW! Holy cow! It has been 18 months today since we were LID! That is two pregnancies....unbelievable! We are 18 months closer. To those of you who are logged in around our time, we're closer,hang in there. Congrats on your major anniversaries.

Scroll down to the August 10 entry.

I wrote a draft that I can not move up. So work those fingers and scroll down to view it.

A cool invention

Okay, check this out!

800 days

Eight hundred days ago, we started this process for our daughter. Eight hundred days have passed. We signed that contract on June 1, 2005. It took us until Jaunary 15, 2006 to gather our dossier. It amazes me, because my doctor took 13 weeks to write my medical report. That put us behind what we thought was 3 months. It turns out now to be more like a year. Unbelievable! Well, no use crying over what's in the past. Just like Rafiki said (from the Lion King). It is in the past. Our daughter will be coming. I have seen it first hand with my friends. It really does happen. I am getting pangs of excitement thinking about what is our future. I firmly believe that we will be there by this time next year. I really believe that WORST CASE SCENARIO....we will be there for the Olympics.
Nonetheless, let's see how high that ticker gets by the time Flora is home. Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? I am guessing 1108 days! Only 308 days left! We have passed the point of no return!

Diaper Bag Challenge

Ye ole' diaper bag.....One of my DTC January peers has started a cool little blog to keep us occupied. Packing lists challenge. First up the diaper bag challenge. What to put in the diaper bag for China. Let me start by saying I am a minimalist. The less the better. I am nearly always prepared, but at a minimalist level. For example, why would I carry nail clippers in my diaper bag? I can cut nails at home. If, IF there is a nail emergency....can you say Walgreens? Having said that here is my list.
First up: the Diaper Bag.

The changing pad is included with this bag.
Next, Diapers (4) and Wipes


Diaper ointment (I found that I didn't use it much, and it was heavy) So here is my solution.


Check out this web site for travel sized items. It is very cool!
Next, I keep one burp cloth for whatever. I found this fancy one at Target. It is part of the Amy Coe line.

A Bottle with many liners. My girls (and I) have always preferred the Playtex style (not the drop-ins, as I have found that they leak easily) bottles.

I love these scented dirty diaper bags. They are a MUST for China sans the holder.

A really cool blanket.

Shout Wipes for "accidents and spills."

Take and toss spoons that I won't toss, but if they are lost, I will not mind. A plastic knife and fork to cut-up food. I hear that they can be difficult to find as chopsticks are mainly used.



Oh, I forgot the cute bib. I am not so hot on disposable ones (not environmentally friendly you know).

I had purchased a thermos per all the recommendations. I have since decided against it and opted for this cool invention. It is lighter too.


Some things may be omitted or added, depending upon the age of our daughter. A younger child may warrent an extra outfit. An older child might warrant a sippy cup and/or child sized utensils.

My Referral Calculations

So I spent hours....H-O-U-R-S trying to predict the future. I want to know when that referral is coming. We want to repeat the vacation of a lifetime, the BVI, on a sailboat. Ideally, we want Flora to join us. We feel that it would be a fantastic trip with her, especially being recently home. Bonding would be great as it would be uninterrupted family time together. But the question remains, do we book? or do we anticipate a summer referral/travel. So I spent Monday morning figuring it out. Here are my predictions which are similar to RQ and Dave's. I used RQ's numbers and I used both to see if my numbers were way off. They weren't. I used formulas and I used dreaming to calculate my referral date. Here they are.....


ODDS: Likely, Hopefully, Dreaming
Sept: 24 Nov, 29 Nov, Finish Nov
Oct: 4 Dec, 9 Dec, 10 Dec
Nov: 8 Dec, 21 Dec, 20 Dec
Dec: 15 Dec, 5 Jan, 31 Dec
Jan: 26 Dec, 13 Jan, 15 Jan
Feb: 6 Jan, 24 Jan?, 31 Jan
Mar: 13 Jan, 4 Feb?, 15 Feb
Apr: 21 Jan?, 15 Feb?, 29 Feb
May: 29 Jan?, 26 Feb?, 7 Mar
Jun: 6 Feb?, 8 Mar?, 14 Mar
Jul: 16 Feb?, 19 Mar?, 21 Mar
Aug: 24 Mar?, 30 Mar?, 28 Mar

Disclaimer: Anything with a ? denotes no actual number info, but more based on formula and past records. I also do not claim to "take over" the RQ prestigious position and Dave's accurate formulations. I just want to know when, WHEN, W-H-E-N!!!!!